spike (spikenheimer) wrote,

elevator up, elevator down.

feeling like life is managable now.
had a random few days here and there, but i'm coping.
i love this girl and she loves me. thats all i should think about.
she wants to spend time with me and i want to spend time with her.
right now we've got our own issues to overcome.

sometimes i feel sad and i dont know where things are going. we're in this holding space while we figure things out. in the meantime we have this undefined serious relationship that is best described as "seeing each other" on the way towards "dating"... when i'm in a badish mood i think of it as limbo. most of the time, i feel its just an extended "seeing each other" aka the zone before "dating" lol.

meantime there are good nights and bad nights. the bad ones usually come after i'm feeling low and insecurity levels are up. luckily the girl is amazing and i have a great support structure of friends and professionals.

otherwise life is pretty damn cool. although the full time work thing is grating on me lately. i've become quite aware that i don't have time to shoot photos or to make music. between a full time job and derby i'm just... without the time. sadface. i'm flirting with the idea of changing that... we'll see.
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